Epitafio - fin de temporada 2009 - Not Coming Back...?

Pido una disculpa al lector recurrente en este blog, debido a situaciones personales he decidido dejar de publicar tanto aqui como en todos mis espacios por un tiempo... cuanto?, la verdad no se... tengo un viaje interno que hacer y esto me llevara, espero, a nuevos lugares en mi vida.

Espero regresar pronto con mas escritos, con mas historias y sobre todo con un nuevo capitulo de "Donde Caminar Era La Unca Solucion".

Disculpen mi incapacidad para continuar, pero debo de encontrar nuevos brios, nueva sangre y sobre todo una nueva razon para Vivir, Escribir y seguir adelante.


Siempre suyo
Nailo Gottblut

Search So Long For You

There is a revolution inside
A revolution of thoughts
A revolution of feelings
and they are all for you.

And which is the reason for that?
Is it leading me somewhere?
Will it take me to you?
I want to be with you.

I can't seem to find redemption
Not even in this revolution
I can't seem to see the light
Not even through your eyes.

What was the reason for you, doing that?
please don't say goodbye
what was the reason for this?
Supposed redemption.

Lost inside the darkness
with half-shut eyes
I see no past, no present
And above all, no future.

I stay here in the dark
In agony I remain
I try to be a good man
but the enemy I remain.

And I want to shout
My feelings are all for you
And I promise to take them
Through the braking times.

And I search so long for you
Endless nights
Yes, I search so long for you
My whole life.

Nailo Gottblut
25/10/09

Are You In?

Are you in?

Or are you out?

It doesn't matter

I`ll be waiting.

But who I am?

I`m lost inside

With no character

Unable to see the light.

Wondering in the dark

Asking God

If you are in

Or if you are out.

But of chaos I am

In darkness I hide

With no character

Unable to see the light

So I ask myself

Am I in? Or, Am I out?

And it matters to know

If you will be waiting.

Nailo Gottblut

19/10/09

Of Nothing

You were left alone
With nothing left to lose
So, how does it feel?
You ran out of nothing.

Your whole world is on fire
And suddenly everything is worse
You are left alone
You ran out of nothing.

You are so lost
Fragile as you are
So, how does it feel?
When adrenaline runs dry.

Where do you go?
When you feel you don’t belong
There is nothing left
You’ve ran out of nothing.


Nailo Gottblut
10/15/09

My Other I

Standing here
In the middle of fucking nowhere
Right where I belong
Standing all alone.

Trying to find a reason
A reason why I should live or die
It’s time to say goodbye
Goodbye my other I.

Endless sadness
Filling my heart
Let go your mind
Be by my side

Which is the reason for this life?
What was the reason for you, doing that?
To leave me wondering here for you
All this endless nights.

I feel this hollow inside
Hear the cries of my bleeding heart
But it’s time to say goodbye
Goodbye my other I.

Nailo Gottblut
10/19/09

Be Here

I feel this love
And I hang on every word
My only air is your breath

Only you live in me
You are my favorite passion
I’m your favorite game
I’m your favorite slave

In your eyes
The world disappears
Lost in your innocence

The soft feel of your skin
Makes me disappear in your kiss
Makes my fear go away
I always want to feel like this

And I hang on your every word
My only air is your breath
Tide to your soft skin
Will you always be here?

Nailo Gottblut 23/08/09

To Feel Who I Need To Be

All alone tonight
Regretting all times passed
Regretting all your lies
It’s time to say good bye

Feeling nothing but pain
Everything has gone to hell
No longer alive
But not yet dead

Lost inside this hate
Lost inside the thought
Everything has gone to hell
But I’m not dead yet

Imprisoned in this cell
Left alone and afraid
Hunted by despair
I know there is nothing left

You came and released me
You said to find myself
But you never told me to feel
To feel who I need to be


Nailo Gottblut 10/08/09

Icen La Bandera

Icen la bandera
Pero solo a media asta
Icen la bandera
Por el que ya no esta

Un saludo estoico
Al que se ha ido
Con la cara en alto
Con cariño a un buen amigo

Icen la bandera
Pero solo a media asta
Por el que ya no esta

Por el que está muerto
Y aun le llamas amigo

Icen la bandera
Pero solo a media asta
Por el que ya no esta

Por los que dejamos atrás
Por los que nos dejaron atrás
Por Ramón, Por Raul, por Marcela
Por Sandra y por Celia.

Por ellos y más
Icen hasta media asta esa bandera.


Nailo Gottblut
10/08/09

Whisper

You used to be in the wind
You used to be in every feel
When your voice used to sing
And you whispered your love into my ear

A love not meant to last
A fire that has burn out
A lie brought to light
And I reaped your love out of my heart

I thought that you would move on
I thought that you would carry on
But now that I am gone
Your love has been withdrawn

Now that I am gone
All you have of me is the wind
And pain, hate, love, and fear
I whisper into your ear

Nailo Gottblut The Last Dark Lord 14/Jun/09

Deeper Than Skin

I miss your touch
I miss your taste
But could never tell
If your touch was deeper than skin

But no matter how
How long I try
To kill your taste
Nothing will wash it away

I’m sitting in my room
Trying to silence my head
But silent whispers
Are forced inside my head

Morning comes, I’m wide awake
I have challenged my limits
I feel that I’m becoming clean at last
But I still can’t tell…

If your touch was deeper than skin.

Nailo Gottblut
3/Jun/09

La Respuesta A Una Pregunta Estupida

Yo no quiero que me quieras
De ninguna manera,
Yo no quiero que me ames,
Yo no quiero que me desees, de ninguna manera.

Ni siquiera me interesa
Si te importa mi vida o mi muerte,
Ni si te importa mi amor,
El amor que te guardo.

Pues te guste o no, te amo,
Pues te guste o no, tu a mí,
Y si, si me importas.

Por eso, no me importa
Como me quieras,
O si me quieres en lo absoluto.

Pues mientras yo lo haga por ti,
Nada más importa, más que tu
Y lo que yo siento.

Nailo
30/MAR/06

Something

You don’t know?
Or you don’t want to know?
But don’t be so distant
Come back and find out.

Come and tell me the truth
So I can tell you,
Tell you all about myself
Down to the detail.

Because against the odds
We know, we belong
We know, we are bound
Even if we try to deny.

So let the rain come
We shall not be afraid
This love will bloom
Everything else can fade.

Nailo Gottblut The Last Dark Lord 14/05/09

Come Back

I don’t want to be saved
I want to go down with you
And I´m still dreaming of you
Get out of my mind and come back.

I want to give in to you
I want to live in you
And I thought it was too late since I lost you.

And I tried to be myself
Tried to be strong and hide what I feel inside
And now it doesn’t matter how I feel
Now we are apart.

The light inside is giving up
The heart is quitting
The soul is turning cold
The eyes cry in response of the inside.

I want to go down with you
I want to be by your side
Either be in heaven or hell
In joy or sorrow.

And I’ll be there waiting wherever you are
To hold you all my life
But everything I do for me
Is that which I can’t do for you.

And still I don’t want to be saved
I want to go down with you
And together we’ll find a way to come back
Somewhere in our souls we’ll find the way.

There will be no mercy for me
This desire and yearning burn deep
And the only thing that I could save
Is the feeling of being with you.

I have you here in my dreams at night
Holding my hands
And then I wake up and you are not there
Get out of my mind and come back.

Nailo Gottblut The Last Dark Lord 12/05/09

El decir: Te quiero

Cada vez que pienso en ti
Cuando digo te quiero
La verdad sale de mis labios
Me gustaría decírtelo antes de cualquier otra oración
Solo para que nunca dejara tu mente el pensamiento de lo que siento
Porque ente más lo digo más seguro estoy de lo que siento
Porque entre más lo digo más lo creo
Porque es el primer paso para mucho más
Porque te quiero
Porque eso siento muy dentro de mí
Porque mis manos tiene ansias de ti
Porque mis labios extrañan los tuyos
Porque mi cuerpo extraña el tuyo
Porque te quiero

Porque cada vez que dices te quiero
Quiero que lo sigas diciendo
Porque sí, entre más lo dices
Y más lo escucho,
Más sé que es verdadero
Y sí también más me lo creo
Y sí también más te siento
Y sí también más te extraño
Y sí también te quiero


Nailo Gottblut The Last Dark Lord 08/04/09

Si te quieres ir con otro

Si te quieres ir con otro, solo dilo...
Pero no esperes nada de mí ¡NADA!
Porque nada tendrás.

Porque, me morderé el corazón al verte,
Y ni una palabra saldrá de mi boca
De mis ojos ni una lagrima, ni una mirada
De mi alma ni un suspiro

Porque nada te llevaras de mí... y nada me llevare de ti
Será como si no te conociera
Por más que duela
Por más que me lastime

Nada quedara del hombre que conociste
Solo el odio, el enojo, la ira y las ganas
Ganas de tomarte
Ganas de besarte
Pero solo veras la figura de metal de un hombre integro y entero

Y aunque tal vez en soledad y silencio
Llore, grite y sangre
De frente, de mi no tendrás nada
Ni un hola ni un adiós, ni una mirada, ni un suspiro
Solo el Odio.

Nailo Gottblut The Last Dark Lord 08/04/09

Infected By A Poisonous Snake

I feel the poison
I feel it running through my veins
I feel this sweet numbness of your love

It is pouring from your sweet mouth
I feel it coming down my throat
It is filling my system

With your nails scratching my back
I feel it entering through the wound
I feel it mixing with my blood

I feel it reaching every corner
I feel it making its way to my brain
Corrupting my mind, leaving me thoughts of you

Now infected by your poison
I know the only cure is inside you
And I don’t want to die

I want the cure as much as I want the poison
I’ve become addicted to you
Addicted to the taste of you

Infected by a poisonous snake
Infected by its sweet venom
Infected and longing for more

I need to say, need to yell
That I need to have more of her poison
That I want to remain poisoned

You are my venom
You are my cure
I... I am yours

Nailo Gottblut The Last Dark Lord 27/02/09

This Is Me Pretending

This is my last letter
This my last try
This is my last cry for help

This time it is all so clear
And I’ll give it all away
Everything to have you here

Everything to go home to you
To have you in my arms
To hold me when I’m down

I wish this was all so real
I wish you were here
I wish these wasn’t a dream

Your arms around me
Your eyes lost in mine
I just want a single kiss

This is my last letter
This is my pretending
This is all I need.

Nailo Gottblut The Last Dark Lord 21/01/09

Until the sun rises up

Why does it feel like night today?
Why does it feel like you’re not coming back?
But, why is it that it doesn’t feel like goodbye?
And I find the answers aren’t so clear.

I just fell like falling
I feel like I’m closer to the age
About to fall, about to know the end
I feel broken and can’t get fixed.

Cause no matter how far we’ve come
I can’t seem to be able to see tomorrow
No matter how strong we’ve become
I can’t seem to be able to see you.

You’ve taken away fear and despair
You’ve taken more of me than anyone
You always acted like a compass
You’ve given me guide.

You are long gone
You are only in my mind
Crawling through my memories
Inciting the loss of control

Your passion drives me mad
Your passion makes me fall
Your love confuses what is real
You are the finest drug.

But I want to know the truth
I want to know what’s inside your love
You have to let me inside your heart
You have to stop the run around.

No more lies
Open up your heart
I want in
Your true emotions want out.

You put on your daily mask
But only lie to the inside
You’ve lost so much trapped in lies
And I’m left outside

See the world, see the light
Let me go inside the mind
I just want one thing
To free your heart.

Keep this in mind this night
And keep it forever in your heart
I want you as you are
Even if you lie

I’ve given you my trust
I’ve given you my love
You know you have my heart
Believe this words coming from my heart

I remember who you were
You were the blood in my veins
The warmth in my heart
The fire in my eyes.

Now I’m sick of the tension
Sick of you trying to hide your true heart
Sick of me being tired of trying
Sick of not having your arms

But if this will come to an end
In the memories you’ll find me
When your heart feels like burning up
When the cold wind blows.

And I’ll be there
I’ll hold you thought the night
And be there to fight the darkness
Until the sun rises up.

Just a memory
Just a thought
One last night
Until the sun rises up.

Nailo Gottblut
The Last Dark Lord
21/01/09

Renaissance in Blood

Bleeding from the deadly wound
Drowning in this river of pain
Drinking from the stream of fear
Surrounded by destruction

A sacrifice,
The end of my life
Covered in blood
Death is freeing my soul

A cold wind blows from the sky
The blood dries
The fury goes away
The soul rides through the light

Screams fill the air
The gates of death open their arms
Fire enlightens the blackest night
No battle left to fight

A voice whispers to my ear
The voice of the long lost
Telling me not to go
Not to go past the doors of death

A sweet voice makes a promise
The promise to see us again
A promise that ends the ritual
The ritual of a new life

In a pond of blood
Surrounded by skulls
The body takes form
It only needs a soul

The soul arrives filled with darkness
Filled with new life
Filled with a new power
Sealing the ritual

A dark ritual
That fulfills the promise
A ritual that brings
Renaissance…

Renaissance in Blood

Nailo Gottblut The Last Dark Lord 16/01/09

Brother

This is the last time I will call anyone a Brother and its all because of you, you betrayedbetray me, you failed me for the last time, the confidence was broken when you where supposed to tell me what happenedhappen between you and her, but you didn’t, you hidhide it from me and that is why now I don’t want you any more, you are not welcome any more. I want you out of my head, out of my heart, YOU ARE NOT WELCOME ANY MORE!!!

I have had enough of you and your lies and for all what that I have given gave you, you will pay and suffer for all times, because for you, I can’t don’t love any more, you I will reap you of my heart, you are not my brother any more, you are aan stranger on the street, I don’t even turn around and see, you are invisible, you have disappeared fromof my sight, you are no more by my side.

Seatle my brother has died, and I loved him so much, but now he is gone, he is no more in this world, no more willwould I suffer his betrayal, no more will I share a nice evening byat his side talking about nothing relevant, talking about the things that life has to offer, talking about our dreams, our truth, even thoughdoe he never gave me that.

My brother has died tosuffered death in my eyes, and I suffer for that, for I lovedlove him with all my heart, he was my companion, my shoulder to cry on, but he has gone to oblivion, he was the one I could take comfort fromin, he was the one who understoodto understand my pain, my love, and everythingall that I am, but he is lost now, clouded by denial of his path, blinded by life, he was cut down from my stream of life and he I don’t know if he will come back.

But if he does, I hope he will be a new man; but few come back from this oblivion as men, as warriors, or as repented men willing to change, willing to do things right, so I will ask… What kind of man you are you? Will you come back?

I think I still expect to much from you my friend, MY SO CALLED “BROTHER”,, I will like to ask you not to fail me any more but I don’t know if you are able to do that, for I have given you tooas many chances, but I gave you always turnedturn your back on me and let me down and you broughtbring pain and anger to my life.

There is no forgiveness for that, but I’ve tried andto let it pass, but at the moment now I don’t know if I can handle that this time you have gone tooto far by makingkeeping me living a lie, a lie that will hunt us both of us till the end of time.

DoughDoe I’ll love you to the end of times, you are gone now, meant never to come back.

So now my last thought for you is this one along with my last advice…

Be aware of your actions, for they are hurting others, be kind to your kin be honest to your love ones, cause your lies are bringing them and you down, and this lies make your credibility disappear and you will fall for that, yeah, you will fall into loneliness and no one will want you around.

I love you so much and for that I give both this advice and the benefit of doubt, I want you back, back into my life so please come back as a new man, don’t let me down, don’t let me forget this love I have for you, don’t let this love become just a thought, a memory…

Nailo Gottblut

The Last Dark Lord